When was the first time you really felt like a grown up (if ever)?

It was when I realized I had no one else to depend on but myself.

It’s not when I turned 18 (good thing we didn’t spend on a fancy celebration).

Not when I graduated from university (I actually just lost my life’s direction).

Not when I landed my first job (though admittedly, I felt like I was in prison).

Not when I became the breadwinner of my family (and paid for literally everything, even my brother’s tuition).

Not when I moved to another continent to take up further studies (living with my partner still meant I had someone to rely on).

It was when a sketchy company promised to take care of my visa and I was forced to move away to regional Australia (all on my own).

It was one of the toughest, yet most rewarding periods of my life.

When you are no longer surrounded by people who love you and wish the best for you, only then are you literally on your own. And so you are forced to become an adult, in the truest sense.

I was able to pick which house I wanted to rent, how I wanted to spend my money, and what I wanted to do on my free time, absolutely without having to consider anyone else. But that meant that any actions I take will have consequences, be it good or bad, and there is no one else to blame but me.

I did all the grocery shopping and cooking by myself. And since I didn’t know how to drive, I had to commute 5 hours each way to my school in the Sydney city center. I had to ride a 2-hour bus and a 3-hour train ride. My schedule was extremely rigid and I had no room for error. Oversleeping would mean I could miss the bus, and since I lived in Mudgee (where buses to the city only come twice a day), it meant that I would either miss my class, or miss my work. I had a very important role in my work (i.e. payroll) and so that was not an option.

After 5 months of that hell, I eventually graduated, quit that job, and moved back with my partner. I used to think I work best when I’m alone, but that experience made me appreciate having good friends and loved ones around me.

Now I believe everyone should try living alone at least once in their lives.